Monday, July 5, 2010

Proud to be an American

Yesterday was the 4th of July. (Happy belated Independence Day!) My friend Erica and I met up with our co-worker Rick, his girlfriend Daniella and her sister Emilia (oh and Cha Cha and Cachito, they're dogs) at the Miller Outdoor Theater to catch the fireworks. Parking was insane, but once we got settled on the hilltop with our cooler of water, beer, carrots, ranch dip, turkey slices, cheese and a whole loaf of bread, which Rick repeatedly made fun of us for, we no longer cared that we just lugged all that crap a million miles and up a hill. Yes, a million miles. I kept count.

The weather was pleasant. It wasn't so hot that you wanted to shave your head and lie naked in a tub of ice, so that's always good. And once the sun set it was even better. The Houston Orchestra played patriotic music, and then it was time for fireworks. As I stood there watching those beautiful bursts of color and light shoot up into the sky I became overwhelmed with appreciation and pride and hope. I was so grateful to be an American, to live in such an incredible country where freedom is not a privilege but a right. I was also proud to be an American. I looked around me and saw Mexican-Americans, Asian-Americans, African-Americans, Indian-Americans all together gazing up into the sky and losing themselves in the power of those fireworks. You see, those fireworks were much more than bold colors and bright lights. They represented humanity, peace, and hope. It felt almost magical looking up into the night and feeling like anything is possible...And it is. Life is full of so many amazing moments. Sometimes we forget that and take for granted the little miracles that happen every day. July 4th reminds us how far we've come as a nation and how wonderful life in America is.


I want to say thank you to every member of our nation's armed forces--past, present and future. So many have fought and died so that we could enjoy our freedom and our liberties. So that we could have a voice and be heard. Thank you. Thank you for you selfless sacrifice. For those who have died, may you live for eternity in a special place in Heaven, and for those who are still fighting, may God bring you home safely.

God bless America!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Too legit. Too legit to quit...Ever

So, I'm a legit actress now...well, once I turn in my signed contract I will be. And I am so stoked about it! Yesterday I met with a talent agent from Pastorini-Bosby Talent (PB Talent), Houston's most well-known agency. They saw a couple of monologues that I did and offered me representation. Yesterday's meeting was to discuss how the agent-talent relationship works and get a contract.

My agent, Cindi Davis, was so friendly and personable, which made me feel very comfortable right from the start. She said she saw my monologues and that they were terrific, some of the best she has seen (I almost cried when I heard that, just sayin'). She asked me what classes I've taken, and when I said none, she said, "Wow. That's impressive. You just have that natural, God-given talent to act. You don't see that anymore." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I kept asking myself, "Is this real?" I can't even begin to describe how I felt at that moment and am still feeling now. When you want something so much, with your whole heart, you feel protective of it. Your sensitive about it and fearful that you may lose it. And for me, that fear of loss, that I might have to let go of a dream I've had all my life, is what kept me from going after it. I was scared that if I tried acting someone might tell me I'm bad and that would destroy me. So to hear that I'm not only skilled but have a natural, God-given talent is unlike anything I can describe. It makes me want to smile and cry and laugh and scream and jump up and down and stand completely still. It's a moment you want to get lost in and never find your way out of. I'm still living in that moment now.



We all have dreams. From the time we are little we all aspire to be something. And as we grow up those dreams change and manifest and expand and some go off our radar all together (I could not have been a paleontologist. Me and heat and dirt and digging. Not friends). Some of those dreams are HUGE and outlandish and fueled by hope. They are dreams you fear you have a one in a billion shot at reaching, dreams that others tell you you'll never fulfill. But it is so important that you not listen to those people. Ignore anyone who tries to convince you that you can't have something. Even, no especially, when that person is yourself. We are often times the biggest road block between ourselves and our dreams.

My biggest dream is to be an actress, to be on the big screen, to walk the red carpet and win an Oscar. Are those big dreams? Yes. Are they hard to achieve? Yes. But will that hinder my ability to go after them? NO. For the longest time I let myself keep me from pursuing my dream. I provided myself with excuse after excuse. And then last year I decided that I was no longer going to set by and watch my dream dissipate, leaving me with regret and constantly asking, "What if?". The feeling you get knowing that you are going after what you want is almost as good as getting what you want. So many people don't even try to achieve their dreams, so just making the effort is a great step forward.


I still have a long way to go before reaching my ultimate goal and a lot of obstacles that I will have to overcome on the way, but I just have to take this one step at a time, day by day. And then one day I'll look up and be standing on top of the world : )

I know this post is long and likely even boring, but I just want everyone to know that you CAN have anything you want. Anything. You just have to be willing to work for it and, at times, fight for it. When I was little and told my mom I wanted to be an actress she was completely supportive but said, "Just know that no one from Hollywood is just going to come knock on our door one day and say 'We want to put your daughter in a movie.'" In other words, you have to work for what you want. So please, please, please, if you have a dream, no matter how big or small, go for it. It's yours.

Before I shut up I want to say thank you to my amazing family for the unconditional support and encouragement. I am so, so blessed. Without my family and friends behind me, empowering me to keep going, my dream would always be just a dream. Thank you for giving me the strength to follow my heart. I love you all.