Outbreak! Run Away!

OMG! That is all I say when I look at myself in the mirror...That and You've got to be kidding me! To what am I referring? Oh that would be the sudden slew of pimples that decided to appear on face over the last few days. Freaking ridiculous! I feel like I'm going through puberty again, like I'm back in high school...and I HATE it! I don't know what brought this one, but whatever it was I hate you! And I say that with a devilish glare in my eyes and gritted teeth. As if it isn't bad enough to have a case of pepperoni face, I am going to a 4th of July party tomorrow where I will see lots of people I haven't seen in a long time. Wonderful. I can see it now. Oh Sarah, hi! It's been so long. How are you? (that's what comes out of their mouth, while in their head they are saying) Holy cow! What they hell happened to her face? She's too old for puberty. Could she have some sort of disease? Oh shit! Think it's contagious? Actual words--Oh my, I just remembered that I left the iron on. Better go all the way back home and turn it off (awkward giggle). Yep, my world is closing in on me. I will soon be cast out of society. No, I am not being over dramatic. 

Maybe I should just play it up as a disease. You think if I walked into the party with Calamine lotion on my face everyone would believe I'm getting over chicken pocks? How cute would that look? I could rock it out like this kid and get people to feel sorry for me.

Or maybe I'll tell everyone I have that skin disease that sounds like tiger...Impetigo [im-peh-tie-go], that's it. OK, so it doesn't sound like tiger, but that's how I remembered the name when I was younger. Tiger. Tigo. Close enough. I was so going to put a picture of impetigo on here, but after looking at some online I think it's best that I don't. You would totally lose your lunch, or dinner or breakfast (depending on when you read this). Nast-tee. 

Ugh! I am so frustrated at my face right now. You know what, someone should make some kind of very thin, skin-colored, skin-textured adhesive sheet that you can cut to whatever size you need and place it over problem areas on your face and then your makeup goes right over it as if it were your skin. That way if you have a date or are performing somewhere or are going to a 4th of July party, you can feel more confident about your appearance. Say you get a pimple (or 50), just cut out a piece big enough to cover the pimple (or 50) and place it over the pimple (or 50) and then apply your makeup over the now smooth surface. It'd be great for scars too. I'm a genius!...Only I don't know how to make my invention or what it would be made of. But that's all in the details. Details-Smetails, I say.

Well, I'm hungry, so it's off to lunch for me. If you don't do anything else today, you should at least invest some time into feeling sorry for me. Self pity just isn't enough.